My sins are stacking up, as I become more oblivious to the Truth. I cannot escape the world, and sadly, that is the only way to realize what I long for. My conscience is eating me away right now. I’m in a state where, yes I admit, I am even ashamed to ask Him for forgiveness. Indeed, He forgives all. I need it. But do I deserve it? The answer to it is No. But then again, who am I to judge myself.

Frankly, I don’t know what I have a control on and what I don’t have a control on anymore. Countless times I have been told to “let go”, but I don’t know how that works either. It’s an unflinching mayhem in my head. Perks of Adolescence as they say.

Soon, I will be turning 19. Lets hope its for good.


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